Olé El Free Rangers,
Full disclosure: this one gets a little raw, in both yuck factor and violent language. If you’d like to proceed directly to FREE in-store tasting(s) and current sales, please feel free to skip the following chonky paragraph. #NoOffenseTaken
It’s been a weird one, Free Rangers, such that just a bare bones recap of just Saturday’s events (let alone the full week) would spin out to volumes beyond reason, even by the standard bounds of this amorphous space. But in the realm of the truly unprecedented, I had to run a guy off the block for relieving himself in one of our potted trees- broad daylight, Saturday afternoon- and I don’t mean the liquid variety. Then this dumb junkie returns an hour or two later trying to buy an airplane bottle. The shop is packed and several people are already at the register when he slips in the door and snakes up along the wall to the far end of the sales counter, so I get closer than advisable to tell him that he is not welcome here and has to go, extending both arms to corral him toward the exit. When I get him outside, he starts to protest, so I point toward my potted tree, looked him dead in the eye and say, “I’ve worked my ass off to make this corner beautiful and you literally took a shit on my life’s work.” At this he appears genuinely stunned for a moment and humbly blurts, “Oh, I forgot.” For an instant, a tiny snapshot appears at the moderately lit open end of a cavernous tunnel of the man he once was. Then recalling what I cleaned up earlier after him, I further explain that this was the single most disrespectful act in our 13 years here, and that if our laws were different, I’d throw him in front of a bus right now. He walks six or seven feet away before turning back toward me to begin vocalizing physical threats, with which I tell him he is welcome to try. He declines and goes off on his way up Hoyt Street- after I walk him down past the Open Streets seating areas of our friendly neighborhood restaurants, as I calmly explain what might happen if he decided to approach any of our customers for any reason. … Well, it’s rarely boring around here. Who (else) needs a drink?
So anyway, we’ll just keep on keepin’ on with what we do here, which this week is another two-fer with consecutive in-store tastings mid-week, both wine and whiskey. The first of which is with with our old pal, Jason from Heaven Hill, the distiller of some of our favorite quality per dollar whiskeys of all time, including this most recent exclusive barrel unavailable anywhere else in the world: Elijah Craig Free Range Barrel Proof Bourbon 11 Year, clocking in at just over 130°. Because of NY specific laws that make it an enormous pain in the ass to label single barrels with unique proof numbers, this is the first time these classic barrel have ever been available in our market, and our is only 11 Year in the bunch, and the first barrel of such age we’ve been able to acquire from these folks since our very first Elijah Craig barrel pick. Please join us this Wednesday, September 17th, (5-7pm) for FREE tastes of our latest Elijah Craig Single Barrel Bourbon, along with a couple of selections from our hoard of barrel picks past, which will be available as combos accompanying the above in-store only on tasting day. If any remain, they may go up online later, but if you’re set on claiming otherwise extinct EC FR releases, you’ll want to be here on Wednesday.
And then for our regular Thursday show, we’ll be pouring FREE tastes of delicious French classics: a Cru Beaujolais (Fleurie), a legendary Chateauneuf du Pape, and one of the driest Champagne(s) of which we are aware. So, please join us again on Thursday, September 18th (5-7pm), for FREE tastes of Arnaud Combier Fleurie 2023, Pegau Chateauneuf du Pape 2020, and Jean Laurent Brut Nature Zero Dosage Champagne. As usual, all tasting day selections are 10% off on tasting day only!
Now, step right up for Magical Mystery 6-packs! For those of you who have not been with us for one of these, this is a fairly unique opportunity to pick up some old and rare wine (in some cases, irreplaceable) at well below market rate. The 6-packs detailed below are drawn from bottles lost and found in the considerable depths of our cellar, and from my unruly personal collection (and past auction purchases), randomly packed in Free Range bottle carriers. These bottles could be literally anything.
You can expect fair market value to significantly exceed your per bottle price, but many of these are so rare, in these vintages, that it’s difficult to corroborate value with none available at retail anywhere on Earth. All wines are at least a few years since harvest, and many are 20+ years in bottle. These bottles are almost entirely red, and lean toward new world fruit sources (OR, CA, WA), though not always new world styles. Vintages range from 1991 to 2019. Absolutely none of these are cast-offs, and the vast majority were originally purchased with personal consumption in mind, but as we’ve discussed, I own far more wine than one could ever possibly consume. We’ve tried to make as many available as possible, but fair warning, these packs have gone out pretty quickly in the past. There are 3 levels from which to choose, and you’re welcome to claim up to 1 of each.
(!) Click here for Magical Mystery Pack(s) Sale (!)
The Where to Begin (6-pack) is our current into level, which much like a mediocre Radiohead record is still an impressive thing compared to what everybody else is offering. Your bag will contain delicious properly aged wine, drinking well beyond the price.
$199/6-pack – $330 min retail value (55/btl avg)
The Heavy Hitters (6-pack) looks like a who’s who of top shelf back wall type fare. Old stalwarts, and up ’n’ comers alike, your average bottle here is a fairly special thing.
$389/6-pack – $594 min retail value ($99/btl avg)
Myths & Legends (6-pack) is not hyperbole. You will find here some of the finest and rarest wines of which we are aware in the world. Most will be significantly lauded, though some are too rare to be well known commodities. American originals, best in class producers, and very highly rated bottles only.
$579/6-pack – $810 min retail value ($135/btl avg)
(!) Click here for Magical Mystery Pack(s) Sale (!)
*** If you want up to one bottle each whiskey, dry white wine, and/or dessert wine in your 6-pack, please say so in the notes at checkout and it shall be.
Also: previous sales that are still live:
(!) Click here for Buffalo Trace 9yr sale page (!)
(!) Click here for Twin Suns Kosher wine sale (!)
Cheers,
Jack
Proprietor
Free Range Wine & Spirits
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