Hola Free Rangers,
INT. Free Range Wine & Spirits – Sunday afternoon
Customer: (rushes in un-masked, and is deep into the shop almost immediately.)
Me: Do you have a mask?
Customer: No, do you have one you can give me?
Me: No, I’m sorry, our last 4 masks were taken by a group who didn’t buy anything, so I didn’t buy any more to give away.
Customer: So then I can’t shop here?
Me: Two years into a pandemic? I’m sorry, no.
Customer: (pulls out a mask and puts it on.)
Me: So, you have a mask?
Asshole: It’s broken.
Me: Okay then. (exits stage left)
Asking for something for free that he didn’t need apparently wasn’t enough, he had to prove that he was lying to my face as well. In retrospect, I wish I had just told him to leave anyway. I don’t often regret taking the more professional high road, over my natural fight or flight instincts, but this guy was really asking for it. Are you happy, Mom, I walked away from a fight!? … Ummm… what were we talking about?
Left turn: So, the nicest apartment in which I’ve ever lived, I rented (over a decade ago) from a local fellow, who at the time had an exceptional little cocktail joint in Manhattan called Death & Co. Just the one. I believe they were still on their original menu, but I’d have to check with David about that. Everything about the guy was understated, yet remarkable, and his preternatural understanding of aesthetic was immediately apparent. Also, he’s just a damned nice guy, and it’s heartwarming when people like that achieve profound success. I was just getting into the wine business in earnest then, after incinerating all bridges in media that weren’t already dust or irrevocably consolidated and fortified against my arrival. Historically speaking, my timing is chronically terrible.
I was able to afford the 3-bedroom in Greenpoint with the roof deck by renting out one of said bedrooms to my pal Jonny, who the digital world knows better as Eclectic Method. He’s an unreasonably sweet, sharp, and talented guy, and made a damned fine flatmate. Here’s the track he made with Chuck D in his bedroom studio under that roof: Eclectic Method & Chuck D – Outta Sight. Given the vintage, the visual effects still hold up. Sadly, we lost that apartment when the inhabitant of bedroom #3 became seriously ill and did his damnedest to die there. By the time he finally agreed to go to the hospital, he couldn’t lift his own weight, so I carried him down 3 flights and put him in a car with his brother. As a thank you, he got better, stole $4k, and skipped town, forcing us to break the lease, and vacate that top floor Shangri-La, post-haste. David was unreasonably cool about the situation. Some fancy fashion model, who didn’t make eye contact, moved in the day we moved out. … Sigh. … Who needs a cocktail?
So, it’s little surprise that Death & Co just released the first canned cocktails that stand up to the quality of the Greenhook Gin & Tonic and St. Agrestis Negroni which we’ve carried since the day they were released. We can barely keep up with the explosion of canned cocktails (and low alcohol kiddie fizzies that we’ll never carry), and with all of the sugary and/or hollow booze soda out there, we’re not really trying. Though we have tasted a few lines of mostly local canned/bottled concoctions that seemed well-intentioned, and none but our long-time local friends have earned a shelf spot until now. Not only are they sourcing ingredients from high quality small producers (Woody Creek Rye, Bimini Gin), the balance of flavors in the finished product is what you’d expect from Death & Co, which is to say, best in class.
This week’s online only sale is a cocktail 5-pack at the best price we can offer, without actually giving them away: 1 each of the 3 new Death & Co cans, plus 1 each Greenhook G&T, and St. Agrestis Negroni.
(!) Click here for hidden sale page (!)
sale: retail:
Cocktail Singles 5-pack $25 $31
*** SALE AVAILABLE ONLINE ONLY ***
*** This week only! ***
Be Excellent to Each Other,
Jack
Proprietor
Free Range Wine & Spirits
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